Tag Archives: Police

“Allo police” …

Allo police

Irish beer

An Irish drunk phoned the local police to report that thieves had been in his car. “They have stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, even the accelerator,” he cried out.

However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time, and the same voice came over the line.

“Never mind,” the drunk said with a hiccup. “I got in the back seat by mistake.”

Source: Aunty Acid please visit their page for more funny jokes.

ani_irish

Anyway it is …

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The police will always get you …

NSW Police dog collapses after chasing two men for more than 3 km …

deicated police dog.jpg

The police will always get you don’t do crime!

“A dedicated police dog that collapsed after chasing two men for more than three kilometres after an alleged break-in last night is recovering at the vet.

The dog named Kane tracked two men to bushland after they had allegedly tried to climb through the window of an elderly man’s home in Newcastle about 11.30pm.

Kane collapsed after he and his handler contained the men, who were both arrested and taken to Mater Hospital for treatment.

Kane was taken to the vet in a serious condition and is still receiving treatment.”

NSW Police dog collapses after chasing two men for more than 3km


They will get you!

Awesome

Let us hope Kane is Ok.

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Magician UNDRESSING Cop Prank- Just For Laughs Gags …

Must watch so funny

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I am laughing so hard!

Please visit past Just For Laughs Gags for many more I love them.

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Police video …

Shared by Bear Tales follower John

Police are now targeting boobs


At least she made sure he was a real cop!


We are laughing John LOL

The new deputy …

gomer

The local sheriff was looking for a deputy, so Gomer – who was not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed went in to try out for the job.

“Okay,” the sheriff drawled, “Gomer, what is 1 and 1?”

“11,” he replied.

The sheriff thought to himself, “That’s not what I meant, but he’s right.”

“What two days of the week start with the letter ‘T’?”

“Today and tomorrow.”

He was again surprised that Gomer supplied a correct answer that he had never thought of himself.

“Now Gomer, listen carefully: Who killed Abraham Lincoln?”

Gomer looked a little surprised himself, then thought really hard for a minute and finally admitted, “I don’t know.”

“Well, why don’t you go home and work on that one for a while?”

Gomer wandered over to the pool hall where his pals were waiting to hear the results of the interview. Gomer was exultant.

“It went great! First day on the job and I’m already working on a murder case!”


The pigs are laughing

The pigs are laughing

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Man Dents Car With Sausage …

Bear thought you needed to know this …


“For anybody who doesn’t think that Germans are a resourceful people, look no further than the recent story of a 49-year-old man who found a way to dent a car with a giant sausage.”

Police in Neubrandenburg, Mecklenburg-Western Pomerania were investigating the incident.

“The man wielded the meat Saturday in retaliation for another German parking his car in a way he felt was a bit too careless. With his son nearby, the man smacked the BMW with a nearly foot-long sausage, denting the vehicle. Police in Neubrandenburg, Mecklenburg-Western Pomerania were investigating the dent with suspicion that a metal clip at the end of the jumbo frank had caused the damage.”

sticksauage

Please visit source: Man Dents Car With Sausage


Hope you needed to know that!

Don’t you just love the internet?

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The little old lady dropping $20 notes …

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A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her.

One of the bags was ripped and every once in awhile a $20 fell out onto the sidewalk.

Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and said, “Ma’am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag.”

“Oh, really? Darn it!” said the little old lady. “I’d better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me officer.

“Well, now, not so fast,” said the cop.“Where did you get all that money? You didn’t steal it, did you?”

“Oh, no, no”, said the old lady. “You see, my back yard is right next to a Golf course. A lot of Golfers come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower Garden. It used to really tick me off. Kills the flowers, you know. Then I thought, ‘why not make the best of it? So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, ‘O.K., buddy! Give me $20, or off it comes.’

“Well, that seems only fair,” said the cop, laughing. “OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what’s in the other bag?”

“Not everybody pays” she says.

We are laughing

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