Today’s jokes 5 August 2014 …

Peeping

Funny jokes being shared around today we all need to laugh some more …

 

22-07-14 - 1 (1) 10492519_758985834143997_430205101062331542_n 21-07-14 - 1 monday pumpkin surprise 10523961_750417971667102_1319906332604880181_n When-hugh-hefner-dies-meme 22.07.14 - 1 News 22-07-14 - 1

 

The end

 

Hope at least one gave you a laugh.

 

We are laughing

We are laughing

Bear is laughing

Bear is laughing

.

.

About these ads

The wife’s medical test …

codo12

 

Mr. Smith goes to the doctor’s office to collect his wife’s test results.

The lab tech says to him, “I’m sorry, sir, but there has been a bit of a mix-up and we have a problem. When we sent the samples from your wife to the lab, the samples from another Mrs. Smith were sent as well and we are now uncertain which one is your wife’s. Frankly, that’s either bad or terrible.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, one Mrs. Smith has tested positive for Alzheimer’s disease and the other for AIDS. We can’t tell which is your wife.”

“That’s terrible! Can we do the test over?” asked Mr. Smith.

“Normally, yes. But you have an HMO, and they won’t pay for these expensive tests more than once.”

“Well, what am I supposed to do now?”

“The HMO recommends that you drop your wife off in the middle of town. If she finds her way home, don’t sleep with her.”

 

That's crazy

That’s crazy

Bear is laughing

Bear is laughing

Bear signature

WALMARTIANS August 2014 edition …

b84f7bdb73e6918e16571f90e8c65113

 

Have been saving images of shoppers at Walmart for years now. Seeing so many of you viewed my earlier posts thought I would share some more each month.

These are just plain weird to an Australian, please click an image to view slideshow …

 

I continue to be amazed by the images !!!

 

10525792_801305756567825_5806617339422440754_n

 

Anyway tell us in your comments what your opinion is. I know we are terrible people just because we have standards one follower said that they are free from social inhibitions. Guess my standards are wrong?

Source: Please visit … People of Walmart for much more and many thanks to the contributors!

 

That's crazy

That’s crazy

We are laughing

We are laughing

Potential and reality …

family-meal-free-clip-art

 

One day during the family lunch the youngest son Paul asks his father: Daddy, what is the difference between potential and reality?

Daddy turns to his wife and gives her a question: Would you sleep with George Clooney for 1 million $?

Certainly, I would never waste such a opportunity, says the wife.

Daddy turns to his teenage daughter: Maria, would you sleep with Brad Pitt for 1 million $?

Surely! He is my fantasy, his posters are all over the walls of my room.

Daddy turns to his eldest son Raul and asks: Would you sleep with Tom Cruise for 1 million $?

Eldest son thinks a little and replies: Why not? Imagine what I could do with that money. So yes, I would sleep with him.

Then Daddy turns back to his youngest son Paul and explains him: You see, Paul, potentially we are sitting with multi millionaires but in reality we are sitting with two prostitutes and one gay …

But the potential of either is not reality! Work that out?

 

ROFL

Bear is laughing

Bear is laughing

Bear signature

Today’s jokes 4 August 2014 …

Peeping

Funny jokes being shared around today we all need to laugh some more …

 

10172784_10152367215084104_3858839995223971185_n 10500487_758409514201629_2884082087590623718_n toilet seat f5acc087-9cd7-4701-9cdd-bf7190089266 Women-who-dont-wear-underwear 77 726066 Worst-break-up-text-ever 10399986_758724140836833_3912622756363441566_n 10468099_749950281713871_1058335210610890622_n

 

The end

 

Hope at least one gave you a laugh.

 

We are laughing

We are laughing

Bear is laughing

Bear is laughing

.

.

Born as only a head …

head2.max_thumbnail1.jpgc74bff26-2069-4211-9bcd-b1b739b67eacLarger

 

A man had a son, but he was born as only a head.

The man loved his son very much and took care of him, even though he was only a head.

When the son turned 21, the man took him to a bar.

“One whiskey for my boy, barkeep!” said the man.

“You don’t want to do that,” said the bartender.

“He’s a man, just turned 21! Get him a whiskey!”

“I’m serious,” the bartender insisted. “It’s a bad idea.”

“Just do it!” ordered the man.

So the bartender got the head a whiskey, and when he drank it, he sprouted a body!

The head and his dad were excited, but the bartender wasn’t pleased.

“Wow, another one of those for my boy!” yelled the man.

“It’s a really bad idea,” the bartender stated.

“Just give him a stupid whiskey! Geez, I’m payin’, ain’t I?” said the man, a little frustrated now.

So the bartender gave the son a whiskey, and he grew an arm!

The father made the bartender give more whiskey to the head, and he grew another arm, a leg,another leg, and finally the head was a whole person.

The son was so excited that he ran into the street, screaming and shouting happily, and was hit by a car and died.

“I told you,” the bartender said. “You should’ve quit while he was a head.”

 

ROFL

1011384_10151634756937739_399865430_nBear signature

Best Explosion Pranks – Best of Just for Laughs Gags …

Peeping

 

You will love these gags I like the mobile one …

“Get your pop-corn ready and sit down comfortably on your couch because these are the best EXPLOSION pranks!”

Visit Just For Laughs Gags for many more.

I know you are laughing!

 

ROFL

 

Bear is laughing

Bear is laughing

Bear signature

Bra types …

Bra

 

A man walked into the ladies department of a David Jones, one of the largest department store chains.

He shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said. ‘I’d like to buy a bra for my wife’.

‘What type of bra?’ asked the clerk.

‘Type?’ inquires the man ‘There is more than one type?’

‘Look Around,’ said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size color and material.

‘Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only three types of bras,’ replied the salesclerk.

Confused, the man asked what were the types.

The sales lady replied ‘The Catholic type, the, Salvation Army type, and the Baptist type. Which one do you need?’

Still confused the man asked ‘What is the difference between them?’

The lady responded ‘It is all really quite simple. The Catholic type supports the masses, the Salvation Army type lifts up the fallen, and the and the Baptist type makes mountains out of molehills.

 

images

 

We are laughing

We are laughing

Bear is laughing

Bear is laughing

Bear signature